Monday 13 May 2013

Losing the biscuit gambit

the plate of biscuits lands like a gauntlet on the table. If I decline to eat one, I am a calorie-phobic priss who's terrified of displaying weakness in public. If I eat one, I defy my burgeoning rep (thanks to the previous profiles) as an ascetic, and I am a liar: lose-lose.
The cals in/out trap inevitably spreading its tentacles to slim people. We said it would didn't we? So many thought they'd be immune, due to the status of slim. Alas, overspill's a bitch.

Once you accept weight as the direct product of energy intake defined as conscious choice, all weight becomes a choice. Eating or non-eating act comes under scrutiny to a point where it becomes suffocating and curiously undermining of your self expression.

Having been used to at least the idea that judgement on you is somewhat affected by what you say and a clear reading of what you do. It's a strange reversal when the narrative assigned to your body get in first all the time. Acting as a slow growing barrier between what you would like to project and what others would project onto you. Skewering the balance against in their favour, silencing you without necessarily telling you to shut up.

The complete disassociation from fatness and fat people means other people become disconnected from what they are potentially accepting about themselves, through other human beings. The mechanics of divide and conquer.

Shriver herself has overlooked a hell of a lot to get to the point where this was the lightening rod for her to come to a greater realization about weight, because she felt it personally. That seems like a waste to me, especially for an artist.

My biscuit or cake gambit and a lot of others is the giving "permission" to eat one. Others assuming fatz must want to eat constantly, which then enables them to eat things they feel they should resist. What these people cannot do is to eat them in front of a fat person, if they aren't.

I got a death stare over that once from a slender woman this way.  I'm not blaming her. But would she any more than I have thought the overspill of a crusade against fat people would cause her to stare at some fat woman rigid with rage?

Fat people's whole life have become LS's biscuit issue. The crumbs have been going down the wrong way for a long time now. That's why fat acceptance, debates around beauty don't mean diddly compared to this. So let's please stop defining people as disease, so we all can at least know what we're signing up for.

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